The Forbidden Love of Yukari Yakumo: Editor's Cut
by Metroid Life
Summary: A fixfic of The Forbidden Love of Yukari Yakumo... with a twist!
1. Prologue

Tokage sat in a chair, feverishly writing. The lights were dim, but that didn't matter to her. Her new book was almost done, and she would not rest until it was finished. So it's not so surprising that she didn't notice the strange light just outside her home…

The light shone brightly for a moment, but it quickly vanished, leaving behind what looked like a young boy, with brown hair and misty blue eyes. He seemed to be lying on the ground, but he quickly got up when he noticed how cold it was outside. He looked around for a minute, then pulled an odd watch-like device out of his pocket. He pushed a few buttons on it, and a holographic map showed up. He smiled. "Ah, so I'm in a version of Gensokyo, the one with Dawitsu in it. Well, at least I teleported to the right place. Now, I'm in the Forest of Magic, so whose house is this over here?"

He looked in the window, and saw the lizard youkai writing. "Ah, exactly the right place…" He knocked on the door, but the youkai inside didn't seem to notice. Irritated, he kicked the door, opening it with a loud crash and finally getting Tokage's attention. He smiled at her. "Excuse me, are you Tokage?"

Tokage nodded, looking terrified.

"Wha-what is it you want?"

"I wanted to talk with you about your writing." At the word 'writing', Tokages scared expression changed to glee.

"Oh, you wanted to tell me how great it was? I have some merchandise here if you want."

"No, that's not it. See, I was hoping to work with you as an editor."

She frowned.

"An editor? What would I need that for? Who are you, anyway?"

The boy blushed.

"Oh, I'm sorry! I didn't introduce myself… My name is Shimi, but you might know me better as Metroid Life. That's the name I used when I reviewed your fanfiction, The Forbidden Love of Yukari Yakumo. Do you remember me?" Tokage looked blank. "Come on, I was one of your reviewers from the outside world, you have to remember me!"

"Sorry, I don't, and I definitely don't need an editor."

Shimi smirked.

"Is that so? Well, how many copies of that story did you sell?"

Tokage grinned.

"I've sold thousands of copies!"

"Ok, but how many of them were by people who liked the book? Think about it, many copies did Meiling and Reisen buy? A few dozen at least, right?"

Tokage nodded.

"Well, why would anyone buy more than one copy of the book? Can you tell me that?"

"Obviously, they bought all those copies to share with their friends, of course!"

Shimi laughed hysterically at this.

"Wow, you really don't ever read your reviews, do you? Everyone who reviewed said that the story was horrible, or at least hilarious in a awful way. Reisen, Aya, and Meiling said in their review of the last chapter that they were glad the story was over, because now they could buy a bunch of copies, and _burn_ them!"

Tokage stared at him in disbelief.

"That's impossible! You're lying!"

"Oh really? Well, you must have the reviews somewhere, right? Lets see them." Tokage stormed over to a nearby drawer and pulled out a stack of paper.

"This is everything Momiji typed, ok? Reviews and all."

Shimi chuckled.

"Excellent, excellent. Now, lets see the reviews on the bottom of the first chapter." Tokage started reading her reviews for the first time, with Shimi reading over her shoulder. Tokage's eyes widened in shock.

"I-I didn't write Yukari as a human teenager! She's lying!"

Shimi chuckled.

"Did she really? Come now, when you really saw Dawitsu and Yukari together, did they act _anything _like you described? Moreover, if Yukari really was like you described, wouldn't she be embarrassed by this story? Blushing and stuff like that. But she wasn't. At best, I'd say she was irritated. Well, lets move on to the second chapter. Maybe that will be more convincing."

Tokage did so, looking completely determined that she would have glowing reviews, but Shimi figured that was just a brave face she was using to hide her dread. As they read through the reviews, Tokage was getting increasingly pale.

"Impossible, this is impossible! Dawitsu and Yukari hated my story? No, this can't be true!"

"Ah, that's where you're wrong, Tokage. You see, just about anything is possible, especially the things you don't want to be, like the death threat Ran wrote into this. So the phase your looking for isn't 'this can't be true'. No, I think the words you meant to say are, 'this _won't _be true.'" Confused, Tokage asked,

"What do you mean, won't be true?"

"Well, as I said, I was hoping to work with you as an editor. I understand you might not trust my own abilities as a writer, so here's my idea. We'll start with this story, and I'll edit it into something your reviewers would actually enjoy reading and not want to kill you over. It's our proof of concept. If it doesn't work and they still hate it, then I'll leave and never bother you again. But if it does work out, I get the job. Agreed?"

Tokage looked at him, then looked at the horrible reviews. She sighed dismally.

"O-ok. You can be my editor."

Shimi smiled triumphantly.

"Perfect. I suppose I'll get started now, Lady Tokage." He punctuated his sentence with a bow, then sat down in her chair. He was about to start writing, when he realized something. "Say, Tokage? This is one of those Alternate Universe stories, isn't it? You know, where it's similar to real life, but something is different?" Confused, Tokage said,

"Huh? Of course not!"

Shimi frowned.

"I see… well, at least I know what my first change will be…"

* * *

Momiji sat quietly in the moonlight, drinking a cup of tea. The full moon shone brightly, and it seemed like tonight would be a relaxing evening… for once. It wasn't her turn to patrol Youkai Mountain, and nothing strange was happening. There was nothing to worry about, nothing to do but relax… but then she heard something coming up the mountain. Grumbling to herself, she grabbed her sword and flew off, eager to take care of this irritant.

However, what she saw was far more horrifying than any mortal threat. "No," she murmured to herself. "This can't be happening, not again!" It was Tokage flying up the mountain, with what seemed to be a new book in her hands. There was someone Momiji didn't know with her as well. Realizing they hadn't seen her yet and where they were going , Momiji quickly flew back to her publishing house. She landed defiantly in front of the entrance, brandishing her sword as threateningly as possible. She didn't want to hurt these two, but if they thought she would, maybe they would just leave. This was not something she wanted to deal with tonight.

Unfortunately for her, it seemed the two intruders were taking their time, as they didn't show up in the next ten minutes. Momiji sat down, and tried to relax, but it was impossible now. She knew Tokage would come soon, and then she would be forced to read whatever abomination she cooked up this time. She could hear Tokage and her companion talking about something, arguing from the sound of it. Good, maybe this person could help get rid of her…

* * *

"I'm telling you, your changes were horrible! My writing isn't… perfect, I guess, but your changes only made it worse!"

Shimi tried to ignore her, but it was like trying to sleep through a alarm. The fact that what she said was basically the same thing over and over only made it worse. He finally said,

"Look, I think it's a improvement. Maybe you're right, maybe you're wrong, but the only way we'll know is if we show it to your publisher and see what she thinks. So please, stop yelling at me!" The two of them keep flying, trying not to look at each other. Eventually Tokage decided to break the silence and said,

"So, you're from the outside world, right? What's it like?"

Shimi shrugged.

"I don't know, really. The outside world is… complicated. I mean, what do you want me to tell you? I suppose it's a lot like Gensokyo, except it's bigger, has a lot more people, no magic, at least not any obvious magic, and more buildings." He chuckled. "So really, nothing like Gensokyo." After another few minutes of flying, the two reached their destination, Momiji Publications, only to see the way in blocked by Momiji herself. She was sitting down in front of them, but the way she was slouched over she seemed to be half-asleep. She looked blearily at them and mumbled,

"What took you so long?" Shaking herself awake, she added, "Could you at least have come during the day?" Looking at Shimi, she added, "Who are you, anyway?"

"Well, I'm Tokage's editor, as of a few hours ago. My name is Shimi."

Surprised, Momiji looked at Tokage.

"You hired a editor? I didn't think you would have bothered, you're always so sure of yourself… Well, I suppose I could look at this new book. It certainly couldn't be worse than the last one…"

Shimi chuckled nervously.

"Well, right now I'm editing her first book, actually. We were hoping you could publish it as the second edition or something… anyway, I've just done the first chapter thus far, so I won't take much of your time." He handed Momiji the book Tokage was holding, which as she inspected it more closely she realized it was actually more of a folder than a book. She opened it and started reading. When she was done, she handed it back to Shimi, smiling.

"You've certainly made a lot of improvements, I see. I'll type this up tomorrow, and you can get started on the rest, alright?"

Shimi bowed, saying,

"Thank you, Miss Momiji. And now, it seems I have a lot of work to do…"


	2. The Story Reboots

**Chapter 1: The Story Begins**

_Mayohiga, the outskirts of Gensokyo, late evening_

Yukari Yakumo walked through the streets of Mayohiga at late night, gazing at the fireflies happily as they flew through the town like a synchronized light show.

The peace and quiet allowed her to think, think about someone whom she had long admired... a young youkai man named Dawitsu. He lived far away from Mayohiga, but despite her inherent ability to open a gap that led to wherever she wished, Yukari sighed as she felt the cold, gaseous void which existed between the two.

She opened a hole in reality, and looked into the eye-filled nexus, and as the other side opened up, she saw the man of her dreams, sitting in his house next to a beautiful, short-haired girl with hair the same color as fire, wearing a blue cloak covered in stars and moons, identical to Dawitsu's own.

From within the gap, the black-haired, perfectly toned man put his arm around the young woman, and whispered into her ear, "You are the only woman for me..."

Twirling her golden hair, Yukari couldn't help but swoon even though his words were not aimed at her... the woman, Yutaka, smiled a contently as she closed in to kiss the man, but Dawitsu crooned, "Not tonight, sweetheart."

Yukari smiled from her vantage point, and an unbelievably compelling urge filled her body. All she wanted to do was enter the gap, and walk up to Dawitsu, and tell him how she felt, and that, for her, it was more than just a passionate night underneath the stars...

The small, blue-clothed woman scowled in disappointment, and folded her arms, "Okay, then. But I'll be in my best nightgown just in case..."

Winking seductively, the Lolita walked into a nearby lift, leaving the gap's sight. Dawitsu stopped, looked around, then seemingly looked straight at Yukari.

Yukari blushed, assuming the black-haired beauty had noticed the gap. He confirmed it by kissing his hand, and blowing a kiss towards the Border Youkai passionately.

In a small voice, he mouthed, "Some day..."

Yukari giggled to herself, and took her mob cap off, revealing long, flowing blonde hair the same color as the morning sun. Waving her hair, she mouthed, "I love you..."

As the gap closed, Yukari reminisced on how the two of them fell in love. After Yukari spirited Dawitsu away to Gensokyo, she watched him for a while, to see how well he meshed with the people of Gensokyo. She thought it would provide a lot of amusing Incidents to watch, but to her surprise, he seemed to be a… good influence on many of the people he met, and actually made things more peaceful. Intrigued, she started meeting with him herself.

They had talked about this and that, although at first she thought him a moron, and he seemed to think she was callous jerk who didn't care about anything but her own amusement. But… after a while, she really did start to care for him. It was unfortunate, then, that he was with Yutaka, and the two seemed to be in love… until that night. It had been a party at the Hakurei Shrine, and just about everyone was drunk from Suika's sake. The two were talking, and he said he loved her, and although she figured it was the sake talking, he was adamant about it. And later that night, he… well, tried to _prove _how much he loved her. So after that they pretended nothing had happened, but now he knew how she felt, and now, tonight, it seemed he returned that love…

_The Dawitsu Mansion, the next morning..._

The next morning was as warm and as bright as a clouded summer's day in the spring, and Mateyuu Dawitsu woke up, lying next to the partner he had promised himself to. He got out of his bed, at which point he revealed his seemingly perfect body. His muscles were as taut and great as a mountain, and his arms were at the perfect thickness to suit his slender, yet strong body. His waist was noticeably thinner, and his legs were surprisingly skinny in comparison to his arms, something he was a bit irritated about. Chicken legs, Yutaka had called them, and even though he knew she was joking, her jest still hurt him deeply. After getting up, he decided to put on his electric blue cloak, and his perfectly ironed shirt and trousers. He exited the room, and left without eating breakfast, as he had a duty tending to his special cultivated area in the forest of magic, and knew that he had to tend to plants as delicate and as fragile as his soul...

Mateyuu Dawitsu arrived at his field he had grown... it was full of sunflowers. Looking up at the clear, blue sky, his raven hair billowed in the summer breeze as dewdrops covered his face. It was at this point that Yukari, knowing he would come to the sunflower field today, noticed the man, his hair blowing in the wind.

Yukari sighed, knowing that no matter what, she would never be the Youkai that would complete the wonderful young man's heart. At least, it seemed that way… She approached him from behind, and after trying to stealthily grab his tanned pecs, Dawitsu turned around and noticed her. She said nervously, "Um... your belt was loose. Sorry about that."

Dawitsu smiled, knowing in his heart that even though he liked her just as much as she liked him, that the two would never be allowed together. In a voice like velvet, he crooned, "It's alright when you're as beautiful as you are... say, there's something in your eye..."

The two leveled with each other's face, and looked into each other's eyes, slowly closing in until their lips touched. Yukari closed her eyes as she felt the soft, perfect tongue of Dawitsu's touch her own, and the two held each other tightly. After they stopped kissing, Dawitsu gently pushed Yukari to the ground, so that she landed in the soft bed of the yellow plants that populated the area like a thousand well-wishers of their Forbidden Love...

Climbing on top of her, Dawitsu whispered, "Yukari... I... I love you more than anyone I have ever met..."

Yukari, despite seeing the way he behaved around his lover, couldn't help but notice that the Youkai was looking right into her regal purple eyes with his warm, brown eyes. Stealthily altering the boundaries of truth and lies, she asked, shedding a small tear,

"Do you mean that? More than Yutaka?"

Dawitsu's perfect face transformed into a smile as caring as a mother bear for it's offspring, "...she... I loved her once, but the moment I cast eyes on you... I knew it was meant to be..." Yukari knew now that he was telling the truth… and forgave him.

Her back against the ground, Yukari gasped underneath Dawitsu, until the alluring young man pressed his chest against hers, and kissed her for the second time. However, the ever cruel and conspiratorial fate worked its will against the ill-crossed lovers, and the sound of a voice called out to the pair, "Mistress? Is that you?"

Dawitsu and Yukari both got up from the ground, red as a freshly picked cherry. The Border Youkai gazed yonder at the source of the voice, and saw her Shikigami, Ran Yakumo.

The Fox bowed, and walked towards the pair. Looking at the two's blushing faces, the fox youkai asked her mistress, "Yukari-sama, what were you doing on the ground? It seemed that your friend was down there as well..."

Dawitsu turned away from the pair, and said, "It is none of your concern, Ran. We were sowing seeds together, if you must know..."

Yukari smiled at the double-entendre, but Ran didn't pick up on his second meaning, and nodded, "Ah. So, do you want me to sow some seeds with him now that I'm here? I don't want you to work too hard..."

Yukari knew that she hadn't noticed the true meaning of the man's words, but still felt a pang of jealousy flare through her. "No, Ran. Leave him alone, I'll help him if I want to..."

Dawitsu added amusedly, "She's been helping me in a way you couldn't have..."

Yukari refrained from ravishing him where he stood, deciding it would be best to remove Ran first, and simply disappeared into a gap, saying, "Are you coming, Ran?"

Ran sighed, "But I've only just got here, Mistress... please can I stay here?"

Dawitsu offered, "How about she stays here? You're okay with that, aren't you, Yukari?"

Reappearing, Yukari gazed into Dawitsu's eyes... they glistened a pristine white as the sun hit them, and they were filled with honesty and integrity. Yes, he could be trusted with her Shikigami... besides, he couldn't lie to her anyway.

"Yes, I am." Yukari finally told the man, and proceeded to enter her purple void of eyes, leaving the Kitsune alone with her man.

Ran turned craftily to the Youkai, and said, "So, Mister Dawitsu, can you show me how to plant a seed like you and Yukari were doing?"

Dawitsu picked a ripe seed from the nearest Sunflower plant, and knelt so that he was on all fours. Ran stared lustfully at his posterior as he proceeded to use a trowel to carefully place the potential life into the ground, and smiled as he asked, "Do you think you can do that?"

The kitsune smiled devilishly, and said, "Why yes, I think I understand... so, like this?"

Ran proceeded to pick a seed, and dig up a hole in a similar manner to a dog, before placing the seed into the ground, and covering it back up. Dawitsu nodded, "Ah, good... now, I'm going to water this area, so just stand out the way as I do that..."

Ran followed the Youkai as he retrieved his watering can, and after he filled it from the nearest river, Ran gently nudged the can, causing the contents to become deeply ingrained and absorbed into the fibers of Dawitsu's perfectly blanched shirt, and Ran shrugged her shoulders, muttering, "Clumsy me..." before a gap appeared, and seized the Kitsune before disappearing again.

Within the purple, eye-filled space, Yukari wore a face that seemed like a three-way cross between Jealousy, Hatred, and Envy. She waited until the residual sound-waves from the area disappeared, and proceeded to protect her man in the only way she knew: Intimidation. "Ran, I am only going to warn you once. Do not flirt with him."

Ran looked at her mistress, her eyes glittering with defiance and disrespect, "What is it to you? I'm only having a bit of fun... why, is there something you're not telling me?"

Yukari blushed, and noticed that she could have, in her protectiveness of her love, have revealed her terrible secret to her Shikigami, and, with her incredibly sharp mind, formulated a fabrication of brilliant proportions.

"...no, I just don't want my Shikigami to appear foolish. After all, he is in love with someone else, and as a friend I wouldn't want you to get in the way of that. Besides, if you pursue him, in the end, both of you would be hurt, and could never hope to be friends again. I don't want you to feel such sadness, Ran."

"...if you say so." Realizing this didn't sound very grateful to her illustrious master, she laughed and tried to lighten the mood with a joke. "You know Mistress, for a second I thought _you _were in love with him." Realizing she was speaking hypothetically, Yukari laughed with relief akin to several bricks being lifted off of her...

Deciding to change the subject, Ran asked, "So, where are we going, exactly?"

"...away from him! Now, I expect you to know better next time!" Yukari scolded, but at the same time, couldn't help but mentally admit that there was a reason why her Shikigami was acting the way she was...

There was no way one could blame the fox for wanting the tanned, ebony-haired, beauty of a man... that seemingly the world was after...

**Editor's Notes: **Greetings, whoever is reading this! My name is Shimi. I'm a reality warper, interviewer of strange people, and now editor for Lady Tokage. There's... not much else to say, really... Oh! Marisa, if you're reading this, I'm not going to start a Incident... and even if I was going to, I would never get Tokage involved in it, so don't get any ideas! Although... if you do just want a fight, that's fine with me! Just be sure to bring Reimu or Mima with you so I'll have to try!

**Reviews for Chapter One:**

Mateyuu Dawitsu: Oh, hee hee, here we are again... so, this... apparently there's some sort of editor this time round, right? So that's who that guy was... anyway, I can certainly see the improvement aready... but... uh... I DO NOT HAVE CHICKEN LEGS! Um... yeah... they're... pristine figures of muscular goodness and... STOP LAUGHING, MOMIJI! Um... yeah, anyway, I like that you've given an actual reason Yukari and I are into each other... hell, it even seems plausible in the real world, eh Yukar-OW!

Yukari Yakumo: Moron. Anyway, I guess this is an improvement. Still the minor issue that IT STILL THINKS WE'RE A COUPLE! Gah, the newspaper printed that retraction, why do people still think we're a couple, it's not right that I'm unable to walk down my home town without a dumb animal youkai asking me where my boyfriend is... uh... what, I don't have one at all! I know they're talking about him, they have to be! Who else would they mean?

Ran Dawitsu: Ah, I see. I could understand how someone would consider that a romantic event... I know that's certainly why I... um... uh... you... didn't type that, did you? Um...

Yutaka Hadekawa: Oh. I seem somewhat... plausibly normal here. I don't suppose you'll change the part about me being an evil succubus from the brinks of hell itself in this, would you, Mister Editor. Please? I've got to have something that'll convince you... on another note... I can tell you that the Boss certainly is frightening when he's drunk. He really does (italicise 'does') declare his love for you when drunk... a lot. However, I guess I didn't think to myself that his specific targeting of me during these 'I love you' sessions could have meant there was more to it until... well, recently. The Boss is strange.

Marisa Kirisame: Oh! You're an interviewer? You mean like Aya? Cool. I'm gonna fight you at some point, then, if you're up for it. I'm sure you're a bit more varied than that mimicker. Also... I'm not sure where Mima's got off to. She says she's busy.

Reimu Hakurei: I'LL TELL YOU WHERE THAT FREAKIN' EVIL SPIRIT IS! She's stealing my donations! Hell, what does an Evil Spirit need money for anyway?

Mima: Is she gone? What? Even I know it's not good to start a fight with that arbitrarily invincible Shrine Maiden. And... yes, that's why I'm here. I'm doing it because... stealing from Humans is fun, I guess. And it's harder to do it to Marisa because she knows all my tricks... I guess I taught her too well.


	3. Chapter 3

Shimi hit the ground in a plume of smoke, groaning. "Ow. Ok, underestimating Marisa was a dumb idea…" He flew back up, narrowly avoiding another one of Marisa's lasers before firing a wave of bullets at her. She dodged this easily, yawning.

"After all that talk about how powerful you are, I thought you'd at least be able to put up a decent fight, Shimi."

"Well, I'm not that used to danmaku, but don't worry, there's more to come." He pulled a spell card out of his sleeve. "Deus ex Machina: Rain of Blades!" A portal opened above the two of them, and knife danmaku poured out on top of Marisa. She slipped between the knifes, firing star danmaku at Shimi.

Meanwhile, Tokage and Jean watched from Tokage's house, enjoying the view and in Jean's case, worrying that Tokage was going to talk with him. Unfortunately, she did.

"So who do you think is going to win, Michel?"

"I think Marisa will win. And my name isn't-"

"Really? I don't know, Shimi isn't doing too badly…"

"Au moins laissez-moi finir... Well, I suppose he could win, but…" He was cut off by the sound of Shimi's spell card ending.

Shimi laughed, realizing he wasn't really prepared for a fight like this.

"Ah, I should have made a few more spell cards before I challenged you, Marisa. Well, no matter. I still have my last card, so we'll see who's left standing, eh?"

Marisa stared at him, utterly bored.

"Yeah, I guess. Honestly, I thought you'd be better than this. _Cirno_ is better than this!"

Shimi's eye twitched.

"Well, if you're going to insult me like that, then I will show no mercy!" He pulled out his last spell card. "Lunatic Sign: Plot Armor!" A blinding light engulfed him and… absolutely nothing happened. Grinning eerily, Shimi charged at Marisa, firing waves of danmaku at her. Marisa flew out of the way and fired lasers at him, but missed completely. Frowning, she fired again, but he miraculously sped up to dodge it. He spun around to face her, and she fired again, right at his head. There was no way he could avoid this one… so it avoided him. The laser bent and curved around him instead of hitting. Irritated, Marisa fired wave after wave of danmaku at him, but he didn't even have to dodge, it simply wouldn't hit him. After a few seconds of this, Marisa stopped firing, trying to figure out what was going on. "So, Marisa… are you done?"

"How are you doing that! You're not even trying to avoid my danmaku!"

Shimi laughed.

"It's called Plot Armor. Surely you've heard of it? It's protected many a hero throughout countless stories and adventures. It makes sure they survive just about anything, and now it protects me. In short, my friend, you'll never beat me now!"

Marisa smiled and pulled out a spell card and her mini-hakkero.

"Oh really? I'd like to see you dodge this! Love Sign: Master Spark!" She blasted Shimi with a giant laser, completely engulfing him. The laser faded away a few seconds later, revealing Shimi surrounded in what seemed to be a transparent bubble, completely unharmed. He clapped sarcastically.

"Wow, that was a amazing light show. Really, it's almost like you were trying to attack me or something!" His hands glowed, but before he could counterattack, he heard a odd sound. It sounded like something cracking. His bubble fell apart completely, with the trademark sound of a spell card ending. He laughed nervously, and Marisa grinned.

"So, I'll never beat you, huh? Let's see how this works the second time. Love Sign: Master Spark!" She fired another laser, smashing Shimi into the ground. The laser faded away, and Shimi didn't get back up. "Uh, you're not dead, right?" Shimi crawled out of the pit the laser made, babbling to himself.

"So much pain… oh look, it's Mima! Hi, Mima…"

"Um, I'm not Mima. It's me, Marisa."

"Oh, really?" He shook himself. "Sorry, I guess you hit me harder than I thought." He floated up to where Marisa was, looking rather ashamed. "I thought I was stronger than you, but you utterly curb-stomped me. I apologize for wasting your time, Marisa-sama. The next time we fight, I'll be worthy of… well, fighting you. And now, I think I have some editing to do, so I just go now." He started to leave, but Marisa grabbed his shoulder.

"Hold on, I thought you can warp reality or something."

"I can. Observe." He held out his hand and a cake topped with a bomb appeared in it. He closed he hand and it vanished. "See? Warping reality. The problem is that doesn't really translate well into danmaku."

"Can you even hear what you're saying? Warping reality! Danmaku! You could have fired _anything _at me!" Realizing she was right, Shimi smacked himself in the face.

"Why didn't I think of that?" A brick wall appeared in front of him and he started banging his head on it. "Ugh, I'm so stupid! Stupid, stupid!" Marisa watched him bang his head for a second, and asked worriedly,

"Um, don't you have editing or something to do?"

He stopped banging his head.

"Oh yeah! I completely forgot! I have to go, Marisa, see you!" He started flying to Tokage's house, still shouting, "And thanks for the advice, our next fight will be a lot better, I swear it!" He flew to Tokage's house and ran inside, Tokage right behind him. As for Jean, he hopped on his broom and flew up to Marisa, who was tying some rope around Shimi's floating wall. Confused, Jean asked,

"Um, Marisa, what are you doing?"

"Well, I figure if I can put a few spells on this thing, I can get it to fly around."

"Why would you want to do that?"

"I'll make good target practice. Plus, if I run into any fairies or youkai, it can be one of my options! It'll smash them into the ground!"

"Seulement vous pouvez penser à quelque chose comme ça…"

"One of these days you're going to teach me that language of yours… anyway, we should get going, I'm sure those two are busy."

* * *

Shimi sat down in Tokage's chair, with her watching him warily. "Ok, so we're going to start the second chapter… any objections before I say anything?"

Tokage considered this.

"You're not going to really change the story, are you?"

"No, I assure you, it's still going in the same direction, but there will be some differences." He pulled out Tokage's second chapter and flipped through it. "Well, what about this at the beginning? Where Yukari's thinking getting Dawitsu away from Yutaka? It's fine that they're together or something in the story, I can work with that, even if it's not true."

"It's not?"

"No, Yutaka isn't interested in him. Or evil, for that matter. She's a pacifist. You do know what that means, right? Anyway, my main problem is that Yukari seems to think she doesn't deserve to be with Dawitsu… that's just stupid. She's one of the most confident people I know. If anything she'd think she's overqualified."

"Well, I guess that makes sense…"

"And then there's Ran to consider…"

"Hey, I wrote her perfectly!"

"Then why did she threaten to kill you in the reviews?"

"Because she didn't like how accurate it was! No one likes to think they're horrible people, even if they are!"

"That… actually makes sense… but no, she really isn't like that. For one thing, she's very loyal to her master, she wouldn't try to attack or upstage her. I mean, I've heard that 'love makes you evil' but there are certain things that never change."

"Well, what will you do then? You said the story will be the same!"

"It will go in the same direction, but not exactly the same. Anyway, I'm not sure what I'll do, but I think I can figure it out as I write. So, let's get started, shall we?"


	4. Blossoming Hope, Withering Stupid

**Chapter 2: Blossoming Hope and Withered Doubt**

_Mayohiga, Yukari Yakumo's house, mid-evening_

Yukari Yakumo was lying in her four-poster bed, which was adorned with purple trimmings and pillows, thinking about Dawitsu, and how she could get him away from the short, ever-smiling female who seemed under-qualified to be his girlfriend...

Standing up, she walked up to a small mirror in her room, and stared at her pale ivory face. She smiled as she felt down her long, perfect blonde hair, and closed her eyes as she fantasized about Dawitsu doing the exact same, caressing her golden locks in the sun.

But, seemingly as fate's mercenary, Ran Yakumo entered Yukari's room, looking at her mistress in her own personal heaven. In a small voice, she asked, "Are you alright?"

Yukari opened her eyes, her dreams shattered like one of Flandre's "playthings".

"I'm fine, Ran." Yukari muttered irritably.

Ran sighed, "Ah, okay. But you haven't slept all day… are you still thinking about Dawitsu?"

Yukari blushed, "...no. I was simply thinking about the weather. It's certainly strange recently, isn't it? Perhaps that Celestial is up to something. In fact, maybe I should check on her, just to be sure…"

She started to leave, but Ran called to her,

"The weather's been normal. I should know, you sent me on a errand a few hours ago." Her unsaid accusation, that Yukari was really thinking about Dawitsu, hung in the air.

Yukari glared at her, saying, "He and I are friends, nothing more, nothing less... As I told you, he is with someone else."

Ran smiled as craftily as the fox she was, "In that case, can I please become his Shikigami as well? If you are such good friends, you'll trust him enough with me to allow him to be my master..."

Yukari smiled, knowing that now she had the upper hand, "Oh, really? And why do you want this? You're quite a capable Shikigami, and he has his own… no, I don't think he deserves your service."

"I didn't realize you hated him so much..." Ran trickily said, trying to get Yukari to slip up.

"I don't... but..." Yukari suddenly looked up, pretending to notice something. "Hmm… yes, the Hakurei Border does seem subtly different… Ran, could you look into that?"

Ran knew this was probably a distraction, but if there was something wrong with the Border, then that needed to be checked as quickly as possible. She bowed deeply, saying, "As you wish, Yukari-sama." She opened a gap and left through it.

_The Dawitsu Mansion, later that evening…_

Yukari flew into the Mansion, where Dawitsu was playing _Goldeneye_ in the foyer. Yutaka was nowhere to be seen, so Yukari walked up to him. He didn't seem to notice. Annoyed, Yukari coughed loudly. No reaction. Finally, she just said, "Dawitsu, are you deaf?" Dawitsu jumped, paused the game, and turned around.

"Oh, it's you, Yukari. How are you?"

"Fine, I just came to see you…"

"Oh really? Well, I do have another controller…" Yukari smiled, sat down and took the controller, saying,

"You know, you never have beat me at this game…"

"There's a first time for everything."

"Oh, I see. You mean if I were to be blindfolded somehow, you _might _be able to win."

"Hey, give me a little credit! I-" He frowned at the screen as Yukari killed his character.

"You were saying?" Yukari kept winning, and although Dawitsu did manage to kill her twice, when the timer ran out… "Well, you have gotten a bit better, but I still won. I suppose that means I get to pick the next map?"

"What? No, the rules say the loser picks the map!"

"Well, that's stupid. To the winner goes the spoils, as they say. Give me your controller."

"What? No, I'm picking the stage!" Yukari grabbed the controller just as Dawitsu tried to pull it away, pulling Yukari closer to him. The two stared at each other for a moment, blushing. Yukari was about to back away, but Dawitsu leaned in and kissed her. He put the controller in her hands, and wrapped her in a compassionate hug. Surprised, she hugged him back as they kissed, the game completely forgotten. After what seemed to be a wonderful, joyous eternity, they finally separated. Dawitsu stood. "Yukari, there's something I want to show you." He walked behind the TV, and pulled out something out of the dust underneath it. It was a small box. Yukari stared at it in astonishment.

"This… this couldn't be…" Dawitsu handed it to her. Opening the box, Yukari's eyes saw a small, glorious ring, made from platinum so shiny that light shone from it like stars...

Yukari's mind set alight, like an oven cooking a dish of hope, worry, despair, and victory. Thoughts danced through her head, lunging at her mouth for a chance to be heard, but in the end, her mind filtered to concern.

"What about Yutaka? Does she know about this?"

"We'll get married in secret." Dawitsu answered. "To be honest, Yutaka is starting to worry me. She's been acting really strange for a few months now… one day she was normal, then suddenly she was interested in me. She's been completely ignoring Patchouli too… so I don't think she should know. I know she's a pacifist, but considering how weird she's been, there's no telling what could happen."

Yukari considered this. "No."

"Huh?"

"That's not a very good idea, to elope. If everyone knows, then Ran and everyone else will stop flirting with you, and it will be a lot less hassle for us both. As for Yutaka… well, I'm not sure what to do about her yet. We'll just have to wait and see what happens. Don't you agree?"

Dawitsu stared at the Border Youkai, and ran his hand through her hair, "You're so beautiful. Let's get married tomorrow..."

Yukari smiled and rolled her eyes. "As much as I like it when you pretend to be a vapid idiot, I'm being serious. What do you think?"

Dawitsu said, "That seems like a good idea to me. Who will marry us, though?"

"We can figure that out later. It's not like we're really getting married tomorrow. As for tonight…" The two brought their lips together, and the night continued to age as… Dawitsu killed Yukari's character. "What! How did you do all that without looking?"

"Oh, well, it's easy when you have little chibi versions of yourself to work the controls…"

_The Hakurei Border, Forest section, a few minutes later._

Ran couldn't see anything wrong with the Hakurei Border, at least in this part of it. She was about to leave and check the part around Youkai Mountain when she saw Chen flying towards her. "Ah, Chen. Tell me, did Yukari-sama go to the mansion?"

Chen nodded.

"She did, Ran-sama! Just like you said!"

"And what did she do?"

"Well, she started playing _Goldeneye _with Dawitsu, and she was winning, and then she tried to take the controller from him, and then he kissed her!"

Ran's eyes narrowed.

"I should have known… when you said he was with someone else, Yukari, I didn't think you meant yourself… what happened next?"

"Well, she seemed really surprised about it, and then Dawitsu walked behind the game, and he pulled out this little box. Yukari-sama opened it, and there was this really shiny ring in it! Dawitsu asked her to marry him in secret, but Yukari-sama said it was a bad idea, so they're going to tell everyone first!"

Ran nodded, unsure of what to do now. Her master had lied to her, stolen the man she loved… but if he really did love Yukari, then she certainly didn't want to ruin that. Besides, Yukari is far stronger than her, what could she do to them? Then a thought struck her. If they do get married, then she would be Dawitsu's Shikigami too… she would still be with him, and soon he would trust her, believe her, maybe even come to love her… Ran smiled. It was unorthodox, but she just might get what she wanted in the end…

**Author 's Notes: **This is Tokage, just here to say that no matter what this guy writes, he couldn't do it without me! You should have seen him, "Hey, Tokage, I need something romantic, but I don't know how to write it!" Ha!

**Editor's Notes: **Hello, everyone! I hope you enjoyed the chapter, and... like Lady Tokage said, be sure to thank her for the romance, because I really know nothing about it. Of course, she didn't mention how I had to make her tone it down from creepy bandage stuff to a kiss... but she really did a amazing job on that kiss... Anyway, just thought I would address a couple of issues... Yutaka said she was unhappy with how she was portrayed, so I just want you to know, she's not a demon in this. As for what will happen in the end...Nah, I couldn't tell you that... Also, Dawitsu, you have to tell me! How do you make those little Chibis? Please, I just need them to conquer the- um, I mean, do my laundry. Yeah. Please tell me? I'll give you Australia!

**Reviews for Chapter 2:**

Ran Dawitsu: Hmm. These are some good ideas... hold on, do you have some paper? Um... no reason. So... uh... how are you? What do you mean it's out of character for me to ask someone I barely know how they are?

Mateyuu Dawitsu: Am I really that rushed in terms of getting married? I... tried to take it slow with Yutaka... took it too slow, found out she was a lesbian... (inaudible muttering) ...but I think I did MUCH better with Sakuya, what with her clinging all over me like a crazy chick... but at least I... you know what? Romance sucks. Romance... sucks. Oh... yeah, I got sidetracked there, didn't I. If you want to know how to form Chibis, I'll lend you one of my books. It's called 'The Joy of Full-Body Mitosis', and will help you in all you cloning needs. Also, feel free to buy the Grimoire of Dawitsu, it's only five thousand yen plus tax plus shipping!

Yutaka Hadekawa: Oh, that's good. So, what am I in this, just a nice, normal girl? Well, it would seem not, you've noted how... off I seem. I wonder, am I possessed? If so, please don't make me turn my head one hundred and eighty degrees like 'The Exorcist'... the Boss forced me through that and I could barely keep my eyes open for more than a second...

Yukari Yakumo: Um... as far as I know, your eyes are closed all the time. So... at least this time I'm in character. I'm reviewing the pitfalls and... merits of secret marriage with that moron, and I'm actually approaching this like a person with more than half a brain. I particularly like how in character Dawitsu is... he truly is an impulsive, rushing, overly emotional moron... who cheats at Goldeneye.

Hebiko Bimyouna: Did... Tokage really write this? I'm... I'm... actually impressed. There's a viable subplot emerging from this, and to some extent this could easily be far more entertaining than my book for... all the right reasons. Whoever you are, Mister Shimi, I'm impressed. I should visit you guys to see if... Tokage's got better.

Chen: Gahahahahahaha! Ran-sama didn't let me read the other book because she said it was too bad for young people like me, but she says this one's okay... heh heh... Dawi's kissing Yukari-sama on the lips! That's... funny! That's silly!


	5. Chapter 5

Shimi knocked on the mansion's door, eager to get inside. The door was quickly opened by Yutaka.

"Oh, hello, Mr. Shimi. I imagine you're here for the book."

Shimi smiled.

"That's right, Miss Hadakawa."

She let him in, frowning slightly.

"Could you just call me Yutaka?"

"Certainly, it's just you called me Mr., so I figured I should do the same. By the way, I brought a present for you and Dawitsu. And possibly Ran and Chen, depending on if I can figure out what give them and if I can make another portal." He pulled a couple of boxes out of his coat. "But I'm not very good with portals, they always seem to explode somehow or send me exactly where I don't want to be. These are some really nice pictures, by the way. That's what my home needs, more art."

"I see. And why would portals be an problem if you can alter reality?"

"The same reason Dawitsu's power is mimicry yet he can't mimic literally everything: I have limitations, and some aspects of my power I'm just not all that good at. Speaking of him, where is Dawitsu?"

"He's at the library right now, since he thought you would be coming soon. I'll take you to him." She led him to the lift, which quickly took them to the library. The two entered the library, which to Shimi's disappointment, didn't have more bookshelves than is physically possible. Still, it did have many bookshelves, filled with books on who knows what, all enchanted to bite people that try to steal them. A booming voice suddenly said,

"Well, well, well. Hello Shimi, and welcome… to MY LIBRARY!" Shimi looked to his left to see Dawitsu sitting in a chair hidden in one of the library's darker corners.

Shimi smiled and bowed slightly.

"Hello, Dawitsu. Tis an honor to finally meet you, and thank you for letting me borrow one of your books. I can't wait to make little copies of myself, it'll be hilarious!" He chuckled. "Anyway, I brought you a present as thanks. I got one for Yutaka also." He handed out the presents, and watched as Dawitsu opened his. He pulled out a small thin box, with 'Touhou Project' written on it and artwork of the final bosses of the first five games.

"You got me the first five Touhou games?"

"Exactly. I heard you didn't know much about them, so figured I'd get you the games and enlighten you. Umm… you don't already have them, do you? I can get you something else if you do…"

"No, I don't. Thanks! Where did you get this box from?"

"Oh, I made that with my powers. I added a few other features to the game as well, like translating everything to English. Yukari was a big help with that, seeing as she actually knew _how_ to change those things."

"Really? I can't see Yukari doing anything this nice just because you asked."

"Well, not the Yukari in your Gensokyo, but the one I know is a good friend of mine, when she isn't snarking at me and stealing the spotlight. Why does she have to do that, it's my interview, after all…" He shook myself. "Oh, I'm rambling, aren't I? Yutaka, aren't you going to open yours?" Yutaka opened hers, and was a bit confused.

"You got me a chess set?"

"Yes, but it's a very special chess set, a little project I've been working on. You'll see what I mean when you try it out. Also, look under the chess set." She did, and pulled out a book. "That's a book on the magic of spatial manipulation. I figured it would improve your ability to alter terrain… Is that ok?"

She smiled.

"It's wonderful, thank you."

"So, speaking of books, where is the book I'm looking for?" Yutaka led him through the library, with Dawitsu right behind them. As they walked, Shimi tried to open a portal, but all he managed to do was make a bright flash of light. Irritated, he tried again, and this time actually made one. The portal briefly showed his interview room, and he could hear Soul Edge muttering to himself, but then the portal closed again. "Ah, so close…"

Dawitsu asked,

"So, what was that?"

"Oh, a portal I'm trying to make. It leads back to my home. If I can go back, I can get a present for Ran and Chen too."

"And who was that I heard in there? A friend of yours?"

"Friend… No, I wouldn't call him a friend. Tell me, have you ever played Soul Calibur?"

"Yes, why?"

"Well, that was Soul Edge you just heard. I found him a while back and hung him in my interview room. That way he won't eat anyone's souls anymore, and I can use him if I need to. Now, let's see if that portal will work this time…" He snapped his fingers, and the portal opened again. "Ah, finally… Now, what to get those two…" He floated into the portal, with Dawitsu and Yutaka following him. He walked over to a corner of the room, where a large closet sat. He opened it and started hunting, while Dawitsu examined the room.

"Hey, Shimi?"

"Yeah?"

"Why is Flandre's sword hanging over here?"

"Oh, don't worry, it's not the real thing. Unlike a certain mimicker, I'm not dumb enough to steal it."

"Hey, I wanted someone to come after me when I did that! Besides, at least I can steal it."

"Oh, I'm sure I could, especially after you've taught Flandre that 'breaking' people is a bad thing. Besides, I have a talking demonic sword. Nothing you have can come close to that."

Soul Edge spoke up.

"You don't own me, you whelp! One day I will find a new host, and destroy you! I will devour your soul!"

Shimi chuckled.

"That's nice, Edgy. Only, when you eat me, be sure to do it with some salt, my soul tastes rather bland. Ah, here's what I was looking for! A copy of Touhou Mother, that should be interesting for Ran…"

Dawitsu looked confused.

"Touhou Mother? You mean that fan game of Earthbound?"

"That's right! It's Earthbound, but with Touhou characters!"

"You can't give that to Ran! She's not supposed to know about the Touhou series!"

"But… it has Mima! And Giygas! And… and… Mima! Come on, that's too awesome to pass up!"

"Do I really need to explain this to you? The people in Gensokyo can't know about the Touhou series."

"Well, it'll be interesting to see what happens, won't it? Sure, the world will probably fall apart, but at least it'll be fun!" Seeing Dawitsu's expression, he sighed. "Ok, fine! I'll find something else…" He started digging again, smiled, and pulled out a box. "Ok, Dawitsu, do you have Super Mario 64?"

"Yeah."

"Well, this is a modded version. It's fairly similar to the original… except there's falling swords, more lava, and airships. Lots and lots of airships." He sighed contently at the thought. "Anyway, I'm sure Ran And Chen will like it, since it's also multiplayer." He handed the box to Dawitsu. "Now, about that book…" He walked through the portal, and the other two followed him. He quickly found the book he was looking for, "The Joy of Full-Body Mitosis" but when he tried to pick it up, the book grew fangs and lunged at him. He quickly grabbed it by the bindings and slammed it shut. The book struggled to escape, but it couldn't break out of his grip. Yutaka walked over, looking concerned.

"I'm sorry about that, we should have taken the spell off of it…"

Shimi laughed.

"No, that's ok. In fact, I think I like it better like this. It'll make learning from it a lot more interesting, anyw-" He was cut off as the book flew up, smacking him in the face, and promptly tried to swallow his head. It's fangs couldn't pierce his skin, but Shimi panicked anyway, running around blind and screaming.

Dawitsu facepalmed and snapped his fingers, undoing the spell on the book. Realizing it wasn't biting him anymore, Shimi pulled the book off his head, blushing.

"Thanks, Dawitsu, I, uh… I'll just be going now…"

* * *

Shimi knocked, and Tokage quickly opened the door, smiling.

"Hey, Shimi! Did you get the book you- hey, what happened to your neck?"

Shimi held up the book for her to see and muttered,

"I don't want to talk about it… Anyway, let's get started on the next chapter, shall we? Do you have any ideas?"

"A few, but… what do you think Dawitsu would want?"

"Huh? How should I know? Why don't you ask him?"

"Well… It's just, I… I'm scared to ask him."

"What? Why?"

"After what I've done to him, I bet he hates me. Wouldn't be surprised if he spits on me the next time I see him…"

"Ok, that's going a bit far. Dawitsu really doesn't seem like a very hateful person… besides, you're getting better. You show him and Yukari realistically in the last chapter, they even admitted as much in the reviews! Really, I'm sure you don't have to worry about Dawitsu. Now, we have a lot of work ahead of us, don't we? Ran didn't attack Yukari, so the story's already going in a new direction, and she definitely wouldn't join Yutaka on some revenge scheme, so… what do we do?"

"Well, I do have a few ideas." She giggled manically, and Shimi smiled.

"Really? Well then, let's hear them. I get the feeling this will be a very interesting chapter..."


	6. Perennial Doubt That Needs Weeding

**Chapter 3: Perennial Doubt that Regrows...**

_Mayohiga, outside Yukari Yakumo's house, evening_

Walking through the streets of Mayohiga, Ran wondered what to do now. She had thoroughly inspected the Border, but nothing was wrong. And she couldn't go to Yukari and ask for her next orders, since that would reveal that she knew Yukari had went to see Dawitsu…

Lost in thought, Ran barely noticed the shorter, blue-clothed young magician in front of her as she ran into her. Realizing what she'd done, she muttered, "I'm sorry…" and tried to help her up.

The magician knocked her hand away, and she brushed off the sleeves covering her hands before picking herself up off the floor, and asked, "Where are you going to in such a hurry?"

Ran gave the woman a look over, and realized it was none other than the official lover of Dawitsu herself, Yutaka Hadekawa. Her eyes pierced Ran's, and tried to come up with a plausible lie, "I... I was... I was trying to find my mistress. You wouldn't have happened to have seen her anywhere, would have you?"

"I've been out all night, and I can't say I've seen her." Yutaka answered, and began to walk away.

Ran began to panic as she was walking in the exact same direction as Dawitsu's mansion. If she saw him and Yukari together...

Walking quickly, so as to catch up to Yutaka, she said, "...I may as well try to find her with you, right? Two heads are better than one, aren't they?"

Yutaka's sharp red eyes stared at Ran's, and she swiftly noticed the false tone of Ran's sentence, "It wouldn't help you. All I'm doing is going home." She flew off, not giving Ran the chance to speak. Watching her leave, Ran wondered, since when could you actually see Yutaka's eyes? And since when were they red?

_The Dawitsu Mansion, during these events_

Yukari and Dawitsu finally decided to get out of bed, and Dawitsu searched in his clothes for something wedding-worthy. While he was doing this, Yukari opened a gap.

"So, where shall we get married?" Yukari asked.

"Well... what about the Moriya Shrine? I'm good friends with the Shrine Maiden there..." Dawitsu said, examining a pair of pants. Realizing that it showed how skinny his legs are, he discarded them. "Don't get any ideas, I just let Sanae borrow my Manga..." Dawitsu explained, his expression as honest as an Oni's.

Yukari chuckled.

"I don't think there's anything between you two, you moron, you just proposed to me. Although, I was thinking we could get married at the Hakurei Shrine. After all, it's right below us, and I do know Reimu rather well… We have plenty of time to figure this out, I'm sure." She frowned as she stared into her gap, watching something Dawitsu couldn't see. "I think… yes, someone's coming. I should go, it could be Yutaka."

"She's going to have to know about this sooner or later."

"True, but I'd rather tell her later, when I'm not standing in your bedroom. Good night, Dawitsu." She kissed Dawitsu on the cheek, changed the gap's destination, and walked in.

_The Dawitsu Mansion, as Yutaka reached the house_

Yutaka floated back to the mansion, unaware that Ran was following her. The kitsune had no idea how she was going to stop the magician, but she had to try, for Dawitsu's sake. She finally decided she'd simply blast Yutaka out of the sky, since that seemed to be the fastest solution. She prepared her danmaku, but before she could fire, Yutaka stopped in midair and turned to face her.

"What are you doing, Ran?"

"Well, I thought I saw a fairy sneak up on you…"

"You're a terrible liar, do you know that? Like when you said you were looking for your master. And then you tried to distract me from going back home. You're trying to keep me away from Dawitsu, aren't you?"

"What? No, I-"

Yutaka floated closer, her crimson eyes glowing with wrath.

"I know you like him. I've tolerated it up till now because I knew you weren't a threat, but now you're getting in my way, and trying to shoot at me… you need to be taught a lesson." Her hand glowed strangely, turning into diamond. Realizing what she was trying to do, Ran flew off and started firing danmaku. Yutaka simply smiled and pulled out a lump of lead, which she quickly changed into a kevlar wall to block Ran's bullets. The wall suddenly flew at Ran, hitting her in the head. While she was stunned, Yutaka flew up into Ran and punched her in the gut with her diamond hand. Ran backed up, desperately trying to escape, but the wall flew behind her, cutting her off. With no way out, Ran tried to incapacitate Yutaka with her tails, which grew to an enormous size and wrapped around her, holding her in place. Before she could do anything else, however, the wall slammed down on her head, knocking her out. Her tails returned to their normal size and she fell into the forest below. Yutaka changed the wall and her hand back to normal and glared down at the forest hatefully. Deciding there wouldn't be much point in searching for her, Yutaka flew back to the mansion.

**Editor's Notes:** Hello again, everyone! Uhhh... great, Momiji is writing everything I'm saying and I can't think of anything... *mutters to himself incoherently* Hmm... Oh! I'd like to thank Dawitsu for letting me borrow his evil book... *rubs his neck and shudders* and I hope I didn't offend Yutaka or anything... *trails off, stares at the wall for a few minutes* Huh? Oh, notes. Well, that's all I have to say. I should get started on the next chapter, yes. It will be longer, better, yes. ...Why do I keep saying yes?

**Typist's Notes: **Well... that was interesting. Why does he even do these Editor's Notes if he doesn't have anything to say? Well, I'm sure the reviews will be more meaningful...

**Reviews for Chapter 3:**

Mateyuu Dawitsu: Hmm. I seem to have finally met the guy who's helping Tokage with this fic. Seems like a nice guy, but needs to cope better with the whole 'demon books' thing. Seriously, I've had it worse. One time Yutaka made me a 'grand piano' as a supposed 'random gift', but it turned out to be A MAD MONSTER! I mean, I know I should have expected it, but... it was scary, and that's why... where was I again?

Yutaka Hadekawa: Are my eyes really that big a deal? I mean... I occasionally look at them in the mirror... and I don't like them when they're open. What's with you people? Anyway... I guess I'm... a smarter villain. I need to work on conservation of mass. Occasionally I go too far and accidentally remove the electrons from a body of matter and end up with a tiny, positively charged mass with the density of a neutron star... it's not pretty, and the cleanup I have to do to undo the side-effects of the gravitational distortion... wait? I'm wasting time too?

Ran Dawitsu: A Kevlar wall to the head seems painful. Am I the only one who thinks Yutaka's frighteningly powerful? I... guess she's so gentle that normally I wouldn't notice... alas, she doesn't need to physically torture me... she does enough to me emotionally for that... um... did I... just say that out loud?

Yukari Yakumo: Yes, you did.

Hebiko 'Bimyouna': I'm pretty sure... something different happened in this chapter. Oh yeah, Ran got killed, and there was that gratuitous... sex scene... with bandages... and... stuff... hey, what are you looking at! I didn't like that stuff! There's no shame in... JUST SHUT UP, YOU! Oh, you capitalized that, didn't you? Whatever... anyway, I guess that things will significantly diverge from the original story now. I guess you're getting better, Tokage. Just... don't go reading any erotica. I hear that the local crazy squirrel youkai has written an AWFUL one as of recent. Everyone goes on about it. It's called... Fifty Shades of... Mimicry, I think? Uggggh...


	7. Chapter 7

Shimi looked over the last chapter. "So, Yutaka nearly or possibly did kill Ran, and that's one chapter done… albeit it's embarrassingly short. I think there's something lacking, though."

Tokage smiled.

"Then I guess it's time to fix it. For a start, we need to show what happened to Ran, then Dawitsu. He saw what Yutaka did, right?"

Shimi waved his hand dismissively.

"Nah, we'll just say he wasn't paying attention. I'm sure he has other things do that are more important than looking out windows, especially since he wouldn't have heard the fight. Anyway, let's get started on the next chapter, shall we?"

"Sure. So what's being changed?"

"The Reisen scene, since they aren't eloping. And the whole story seems to be going differently…"

"You told me that wouldn't happen."

"I said it would go in the same direction, not that it would be exactly the same. I promise you, these changes are for the better."

"If you say so… are we leaving the Yutaka part in, where she chases after them?"

"Sure, it fits… though we have to do a little rearranging to make it work, and Ran wouldn't be there. First, we need to have an inciting incident."

"What does that mean?"

Shimi laughed.

"We need something to get to the point where Yutaka would chase after them like a lunatic."

Tokage brightened a bit.

"Oh, good, because I know the perfect scene. You'll follow my lead this time, alright?"

"…Ok, but I'm proofreading everything." He looked around, worried.

"What's wrong?"

"Oh, I thought something would happen, like that visit to Dawitsu's house, or a fight with Marisa, or something. This chapter isn't long enough…"

Confused, Tokage asked,

"What do you mean, 'This chapter'?

"Oh, nothing… let's get started."


	8. Fugitives from Idiocy

**Chapter 4: Fugitives of Love**

_The Forest of Magic, near the Hakurei Shine_

Reimu searched the forest, wondering where Ran had disappeared to. After what Yutaka did, she certainly couldn't have run off… something like that was just unforgivable, Reimu thought. She'd never cared much for Ran, but someone attacking her and leaving her for dead like that… she shook her head. No, now wasn't the time for that. Finding Ran came first, smiting, later. Since Ran landed very close to the shrine, it didn't take Reimu long to find her. After checking to see that she was still breathing, Reimu started carrying her back to the shrine. Noticing something hiding in some bushes, she said, "I'm not in the mood to fight right now, Rumia. You can try to eat me later."

Rumia laughed.

"Is that so? Well, right now you're holding onto that fox, you can't fight me! This time you're mine!" Rumia pounced on Reimu, only for Reimu to smack her with her gohei.

"I told you, I don't have time to play. If you're going to hang around, at least make yourself useful and help me carry her!" Rubbing her sore head, Rumia was about to protest, but she saw Reimu's expression. Sighing, she grabbed Ran's feet, while Reimu held on to her arms. Together, they floated off to the Hakurei Shrine.

_The Dawitsu Mansion, at the same time_

Yutaka walked into the mansion, a cheerful expression on her face. "Dawitsu, I'm home!"

Dawitsu was playing _Goldeneye_, but he paused the game when he heard her.

"Oh, hey, Yutaka. How was your trip?"

"Just fine, rather uneventful, really. I have to wonder, though…" She walked over to him and put her hands on his shoulders, making him flinch. "Why did you send me over Mayohiga, anyway? To check on Yukari?"

"Yeah, that's it." He tried to worm his way out of her grasp, but her grip was like iron. He didn't remember her being this strong… "I just thought, you know, Yukari might have some kind of nefarious plan and she wouldn't think much of seeing you, so if you overheard her saying something, or if she sounded suspicious…"

"I didn't hear anything, Boss. In fact, Yukari wasn't there. Ran was, though. She said she was looking for her master, but she seemed rather… adamant about following me home. You wouldn't know anything about that, would you?"

Dawitsu tried not to look suspicious. He didn't know anything about what Ran was doing, but if Yutaka started suspecting Yukari was here…

"I don't know anything. She isn't here, though. I thought you said she was following you, where did she go?"

"Oh, she had to go to the Forest of Magic. I'm not sure why, but she dropped down there very quickly."

"Oh, ok. So… what now?"

She winked seductively.

"Well, I was thinking we could…" Before she could finish her lustful sentence, the door slammed open, and Reimu walked in, quickly followed by Yukari and Rumia. The miko and youkai stayed near the entrance, and Yukari quickly walked up to Yutaka, more wrathful than a tornado.

"Did you really think you could get away with this crime, Yutaka? Did you really believe I wouldn't notice?"

Dawitsu stood up.

"What's going on?"

"Quiet, I'm talking to Yutaka." She pointed at the Shikigami dramatically, making her back up in panic. "Now, you will pay for-"

Yutaka interrupted her, having noticed something.

"You're wearing a ring."

Yukari looked at her hand and shrugged.

"Yes, what of it? Stop changing the subject. You-"

"I recognize it… Dawitsu had it in his room, he pulled it out from under his bed when he thought I wasn't looking…" Dawitsu's eyes widened in shock. "I, I thought he was going to propose to me, and you're wearing…" Her eyes seemed to water, but they quickly turned fiery with rage. "Dawitsu! YOU CHEATING-"

Yukari pointed her parasol at her, cutting her off.

"That's quite enough from you. Yes, he proposed to me. He was going to tell you, but it seems now I have to. Anyway, let's get to the point. You attacked Ran, purely because you _thought _she was standing between you and Dawitsu. You nearly killed her. If Reimu hadn't contacted me, she would have died. And now, it's time for revenge. As I once told Dawitsu, there are a million ways I can kill you right now, using only this parasol. I don't have to do this, of course. There are a million _more _ways that I can kill you with my bare hands, and a number bordering a billion other ways I can kill you. Can you imagine which one I'm going to use now?"

Dawitsu ran over and stood between them.

"Yukari, you can't kill her!"

"I know that you care for her, but she nearly killed Ran, and I can't let that go unpunished. You don't know how horrible she looked…" She lowered her parasol slightly, and wiped a tear out of her eye. "Chen… the poor girl kept shaking her, begging Ran to wake up… I took both of them to Eirin as fast as I could, and now she just sitting there outside the operating room, praying and crying that she will see her master again. And you think my anger is unjustified, Dawitsu?"

"Yutaka… she wouldn't so something like that!"

"You said yourself that she's been acting strange."

"Yes, but-"

Reimu added,

"I saw the whole thing, Dawitsu. It's true."

"But… but… she would never…" He turned to Yutaka. "You didn't really do this, did you?"

Yutaka tried to look innocent, but when it was clear no one but Dawitsu was going to buy it, she simply smiled.

"Yes, yes I did. I couldn't let any other woman get between you and me, Dawitsu. I'm sure you understand, don't you?" She reached out for his face, but he recoiled in horror.

"Who are you?"

"What are you talking about, Boss? It's me!"

"No, you can't be Yutaka… you can't be! She never would have done this!"

"People change all the time. And I thought you would be happy that I loved you."

"I… I was at first. I should have seen it, should have realized there was something wrong… you were in love with Patchouli, I could see it, and then suddenly you didn't care about her! I was so happy that you loved me back that I didn't notice how different you were, and when I finally did…" He glanced at Yukari, and shook his head. "I don't know who you are, but you're not Yutaka, not the one I know." He slumped down a nearby couch, cradling his head in his hands. Yukari kept her parasol aimed at Yutaka.

"Well, I think I've delayed your punishment long enough. However, Dawitsu does raise a good point. People don't just change like that, not naturally. Perhaps there's something controlling you, or your mind was altered by magic. Whatever the case, I suppose fixing it would solve all our problems." Noticing Yutaka's slight relief, she added, "But don't think you're getting off easy. You're going to pay for everything you did to Ran, right now." Without another word, she swiftly smashed Yutaka in the head with her parasol, stunning her, before punching her in the gut. She didn't hit very hard, just hard enough to make Yutaka fall over in pain. As a final touch, Yukari altered the boundaries between Yutaka and Ran, so that Yutaka felt all of Ran's pain, while the kitsune felt nothing. Yutaka twitched a few times, in too much agony to actually say anything, or even scream. "Now do you know how that felt for her? Now do you see the evil you've done?" Yukari nodded, slightly mollified. "…I think that will do. Reimu, it's your turn." Reimu walked up to the now unconscious Yutaka and placed four paper seals around her. Rumia, who had been watching all this with vague interest, suddenly decided now would be a good time to leave. She quietly snuck out the door, just as the seals started glowing, formed a cube around Yutaka. Yukari handed Reimu a hokora, and the shrine maiden sat it on the ground and started to chant. The cube glowed brighter and brighter, and soon it was too bright to look at. The cube shrunk down to a small bead of light before flying into the hokora and vanishing.

_The Hakurei Shrine, a few minutes later_

Dawitsu sat down on the shrine's porch, wondering what was supposed to happen now. Reimu and Yukari were both staring at Yutaka's hokora, trying to figure out how they could bring her back to normal. Dawitsu stared down at his feet, wishing their was something he could do. He was so lost in thought that he jumped up in panic when someone tapped him on the shoulder. Realizing it was just Suika, he relaxed. "Hey, there's no reason to be all jumpy, tengu guy. I heard about your friend, and just wanted to say I'm sorry for what happened. Here, have a drink." She poured some sake out of her gourd into a glass and handed to him. He took the drink and sat down. "Your friend is gonna be ok, though."

"How do you know?"

"Well, after Reimu told me what was going on, I called a old friend of mine, figured she might be able to help if this girl of yours is possessed. Knows a lot about it, you see."

"Who is she?"

"Why don't you ask her? She's right next to you, ya know."

Dawitsu looked around, but didn't see anything.

"I don't see anyone, Suika. Are you sure you didn't drink too much?"

Offended, Suika snatched Dawitsu's glass and swallowed it's contents in one gulp.

"Hey, I'm an Oni! We can hold our drink a lot better than you tengu! How dare you!"

Another voice cut in,

"Well, if he's going to act like that, maybe I shouldn't have come…" Dawitsu couldn't see where it was coming from, but Suika just laughed.

"Nah, he's a friend of Yukari's, and that's good enough for me. Come on out where we can see you."

The voice chuckled, and suddenly Dawitsu felt something binding his arms to his sides as he was lifted off the ground. The air shimmered in front of him, and he found himself face to face with Mima. The evil spirit held him with her tail, restricting his movement as she examined him from all sides.

"Scrawny, kind of weak, seeing as you can't break out of my grip, and no truly powerful magic to your name… though you do have good fashion sense, I like the 'stars and moons' look. Just another face, really. Well, I didn't come here for you, anyway, I'm just here to look at Reimu's latest catch." She dropped Dawitsu and floated over to Reimu and Yukari. "So, Reimu, caught anything interesting? I hope it isn't some poor youkai who looked at you funny."

Reimu glared at her.

"Hello, Mima. And yes, I had a good reason this time. Why are you here, anyway? You want to join her?"

Mima laughed.

"Big words, girl, but you know you can't keep me locked up. I just came on Suika's behalf to see if I can help this girl." She examined the hokora for a few seconds, and nodded. "Yeah, she's definitely possessed."

Yukari narrowed her eyes.

"You're certain?"

"Yes. I'm an evil spirit, possessing people is something I can do. I don't like it myself, ruins the fun when no one knows it's you causing trouble, but I can recognize it. I can't tell what exactly is doing the possessing, but I think I can draw it out. I'm surprised you couldn't tell, Reimu. I thought the great Hakurei shrine maiden would know all about spirit possession and how to fix it!" Reimu muttered something and Mima smirked. "Sorry, I can't hear you? What was that? Was it a, 'Please help me, Mima, I'm completely useless' I just heard?" She enjoyed watching Reimu shake in rage for a second for saying, "Alright, I guess I can help you guys." Seeing the joy on Dawitsu's face, she added, "That is… for a price."

**Author's Notes: **Heheh, you were right, Shimi, the suspense does work better when you leave things out! …that doesn't mean you shouldn't tell me what they are, though! Seriously, what does Mima want?

**Editor's Notes: **The original plan was for Yutaka to chase Dawitsu around like a lunatic, but I like this better! Anything with Mima-sama can only be amazing! And what does she want, Lady Tokage? I'll explain later… mostly because I don't know yet myself. As for what you said earlier about your eyes, Yutaka, I'm just showing how different the evil version of you is, and open eyes are an easy contrast… and Dawitsu, if your head was slowly getting eaten, you'd panic too! On another note, does anyone know where I can find Yuuka Kazami? I need to talk to her about something… you want to see her too, Lady Tokage? Are you… you're sure. Ah, this will be interesting…

**Reviews for Chapter 4:**

Mateyuu Dawitsu: Scrawny? Not powerful? Good fashion sense? Is Mima insane? Speaking of which, I haven't met her yet. She probably doesn't like the fact that I'm living above her effective home... where does she live anyway? The basement?

Mima: Ahem, I do not live in the basement of the Hakurei Shrine. I don't need a home. It's just that... I like to play with the Shrine Maiden there from time to time. What? There's nothing strange about that. Being an evil spirit's a boring existence, you know? I drift from place to place, like the wind. I'm omnipresent, ever-present, and fully fit to run Gensokyo. Vote Mima, next election!

Yukari Yakumo: Excuse me, but if anyone's fit to run Gensokyo, it is I, Yukari Yakumo! I've been working with the Hakurei Shrine Maidens in maintaining the Hakurei Border since the birth of Gensokyo, and have taught the Youkai population many a lesson in how to live their life, making the area one of peaceful coexistence between Youkai and Humans alike. Vote Yukari Yakumo, next election! [[**Typist's Notes:** If an election advertisement is what they want, they should really go over to see Aya. This is not the place to be laying propaganda...]]

Yutaka Hadekawa: Hmm. Something tells me if I were to really act this way for the Boss' sake, he'd kinda like it. That's just the person he is... actually, no, that's harsh. He's actually said that he doesn't like Yandere types, and he apologised to me the other day for being too crazy over me. He needs a girlfriend. Stat. Any offers? [[**Typist's Notes:** Okay, that's it, I'm sending out anyone who keeps using the review section like this.]] **Editor's Notes:** What are you talking about, Momiji? It's just getting interesting!

Aya Shameimaru: Me! Uh... hold on... you didn't type that... did you... YOU VAMPIRE! GIVE ME THAT TYPEWRI-JD,JBDV,FJVBDVXCVNXV,CJXNVX, DJCBSDICKJDBCSJDCKSDC,MCNCXJMCVHVI... uh... anyway, I heard that there are candidates for some kind of election... Gensokyo has elections? What are elections? Are they a festival? Are they newsworthy?

Hebiko Bimyouna: It seems we've gone off topic. I'm liking how despite the obvious set villain is there, she's certainly not one hundred percent villainous, or at least, there's something bigger pulling the strings. On the basis of a certain reviewer's comments, I decided to borrow some books written by a certain Daniel Handler. He made a villain who looked so obviously like a bad guy, and you'd think for the majority that he was the big mastermind, but then it turns out he, like everyone else, is victim to a massive conspiracy, and that he is merely trying to gain a little during the chaos... oh, sorry, I'm off topic myself, aren't I? The point is, layered villainy is good... Tokage, I... I wish you'd answer the door when I knock...


	9. Chapter 9

Mugenkan, the realm of dreams, is generally a serene, peaceful place, with the only sounds generally being the low hum made by thousands of creatures dreaming at the same time, the buzzing of Elly's whetstone as she sharpened her scythe, and occasionally the maniacal laughter of Yuuka coming up with a new evil plan. A portal suddenly appeared, breaking Elly's concentration and nearly making her break her scythe. Shimi and Tokage walked out of the portal, and examined the place, Tokage with slight fear, Shimi with vague interest. "See, Tokage? It's not too bad here! Sleeping floating people, blood red skies, it's like a paradise!"

Tokage shook her head.

"It's not the place that bothers me so much as who lives here…"

"What, Elly? Well, I haven't met/interviewed her yet, so now as good a time as any! Excuse me, you name is Elly, correct?"

Elly nodded nervously.

"I am, and who are you?"

"I am Shimi, bender of reality and maker of really strange interviews. I search the cosmos, looking for the mysterious, the mystical, the enlightened, the eldritch…to ask them stuff! Oh, and this is my friend Tokage. I believe she's had… a encounter with your master, Yuuka. We're here to talk with her, but I'm not in any rush, so I suppose I'll talk with you for a bit. You don't mind, do you?"

"You want… to talk to me?"

"Sure, if that's ok."

"I'm the gatekeeper, no one ever wants to stay and talk with me…"

"Ah, Bit Character Syndrome, a common affliction the multiverse over. Let's get to the questions, shall we?"

"That's fine with me."

"Good. So, what's it like being Miss Yuuka's gatekeeper?"

"It's simple, I just keep people from bothering her. But my job has a lot more to it than that. You see, I was here long before she showed up. I am also the guardian of dreams."

"Really? Do tell, what does that involve?"

"I ensure that no one's dreams are disturbed, and that all dreams and nightmares happen like they should. It involves caring for a special breed of youkai, called Baku, that feed on dreams and create nightmares."

"And what's the scythe for?"

"To remove intruders who would harm Lady Yuuka or these sleepers."

"Is it a good job?"

"Well, I suppose, but it can be… unreasonable."

"Really?"

"Yuuka expects me to always be alert for intruders, even though she really just wants fight them herself, and expects me to guard this place, even though my other duties are more important! She knows that! It's like she doesn't care that if I don't keep the dream world undisturbed, it will fall apart! This whole realm could be destroyed, and no one would ever be able to sleep again! She knows this… and she ignores it."

Tokage shuddered.

"That's horrible…"

"Yeah. You said you were going to talk to her, right? And by talk, I mean fight."

Shimi flinched.

"Well, maybe not-"

"Don't lie, I can see it. You're here for revenge, aren't you?"

"Well, what she to Lady Tokage did was horrible… and she _is_ kind of a sociopath…"

"Exactly. So… give her a punch for me too. Maybe it'll knock some sense into her."

"So… we should see her now?" Elly nodded, and nudged them toward the mansion, where Yuka lived, then got back to sharpening her scythe like nothing had happened. Shimi and Tokage looked at her for a second, then back at the mansion. "So… here we are. Lady Tokage, are you sure you want to go in there? You could wait outside, if you like."

Tokage glared at him, and he backed up slightly.

"I told you I wanted to come here! Why would I do that just to stay outside?"

"Well, yeah, it's just… this _is_ Yuuka, and I don't want you to get hurt."

"Sorry, but if a fight's going to happen, then I'm going to join in."

"Tokage, you're a writer, not a fighter."

"And you have worse danmaku than that ice fairy!"

"Shut up! I've grown since then! I've learned… stuff."

"That was two days ago!"

"I learned quickly!"

"I actually have experience with danmaku, a few years of practice, and the desire to tear Yuuka to shreds. I'm fighting, even if I have to beat you up to get to it."

"Ok, ok…" He bowed in surrender, and said jokingly, "As you command, oh wise writer of fanfiction!" He muttered under his breath, "That needs major rewriting…" Out load, he said, "Shall we go in, then?"

Tokage stared at the mansion's front door, a massive metallic door overgrown with flowers. She fearlessly walked up to them, and the flowers started moving, pulling on the doors handles and opening it for them. The two of them walked in, Shimi marveling at the doors and wondering if he could get the same at his home, Tokage nervously awaiting the moment when they slammed shut, trapping them inside. To her surprise, they didn't. The dim red lights in the mansion suddenly cut on, illuminating the darkness, and they saw Yuuka walking down to them on a staircase. She smiled down at them as she absentmindedly twirled her parasol like a baton. Once she reached the bottom of the stairs, Tokage backed up slightly, gasping for air.

Yuuka grinned at this.

"Welcome to my mansion. I hope you enjoy your stay." The thought of staying here, trapped with Yuuka, finally made Tokage snap. She screamed and ran off, but the doors finally slammed shut, trapping the two of them with Yuuka. "Now, don't go running off! I don't even know who you are yet!" She walked closer, enjoying Tokage's fear as she tried to crawl further away with every step.

Finally, Shimi stepped between them. Yuuka frowned slightly, daring him to stop her advance. Then, to her surprise, Shimi smiled and bowed.

"It's an honor to meet with you, Miss Kazami. I'll introduce us. My name is Shimi, and this is my good friend, Lady Tokage. I believe you've already been introduced." Tokage shuddered slightly at the memory, while Yuuka tried to remember.

"Tokage… no, I don't remember meeting her."

Shimi's smile disappeared.

"Ok, I was trying to be polite to you, but seriously? You don't remember what you did to her?"

"Hey, I get that scared reaction from a lot of people. I mean, it could have been anything. What did I do?"

Tokage tried to stand up.

"I-I'm n-not scared of y-you… I'm gonna…"

Yuuka stared at her, and Tokage regressed into a whimpering ball of fear.

"Now, what did I do to her again?"

"I don't know, because apparently it was so horrible she won't tell me."

"That… doesn't really narrow it down…"

"Whatever it was, you did it twice!"

"Ok, ok, what does _she_ do? That's a good clue."

"She wrote a novel recently, 'The Forbidden Love of Yukari Yakumo'."

Yuuka laughed.

"Oh, that! I really did enjoy that book, I was going to buy it so I could use it as a torture device, but… her obsessive, rampant defilement of flowers was something I could not stand. Flowers are the only good in this world, and I will not allow such a horror to go unpunished. She had it coming."

"Be that as it may, I'm sure there are less horrible ways of getting your point across. I've actually been working with Tokage as her editor, so that her future works can show the writing skill that I know she has. That's positive reinforcement. You can't get people to change by hurting them."

"Of course you can! Usually you change them into dead people, but I thought my point would get across if I let her live… and if you're telling the truth, then I suppose it has." Yuuka stared at him curiously. "Why are you here, anyway? It can't be just to speak on this cowardly worm's behalf."

Tokage stopped shaking, and tried to stand again.

"C-cowardy?"

Yuuka looked at her as though she was inspecting a meal she was about to eat.

"Yes, clearly. You're nothing but a weak, childish fool with no talents at all. Why this boy is trying to help someone like you I'll probably never understand."

Tokage flinched under Yuuka's gaze, but she managed to stand upright.

"I am not weak…"

"I can see you are. I could crush you with no effort at all."

"Maybe so, but… I'm not just going to sit here and let you mock me, not in front of him."

Shimi blinked in confusion, a confusion Yuuka shared.

"And what makes him so special?"

"He actually tries to help me, and he's the only one who saw me as something other than a disgrace, something to make fun of. He came here because of me, to confront you when that's what I should have done… but I'm not going get him involved in my mess. Yuuka, this is where it ends. You'll pay for what you did to me… in blood."

Yuuka raised an eyebrow in surprise.

"Big words, but you know you can't beat me."

"I managed to turn my writing from garbage into something other people would actually want to read. Compared to that, beating you would be easy."

The two youkai narrowed their eyes, and waited for one of them to make the first move. Shimi simply watched them, making sure he wasn't in range of any attacks that might go in his direction. Tokage made the first move, jumping back and pulling out a spell card. "Lizard Sign: Forked Tongue!" A wave of danmaku flew around Yuuka, while a giant forked tongue made from danmaku appeared, lashing out at her. Yuuka jumped out of the way, right into Tokage's bullet swarm. Every time she tried to weave out of the bullets, the tongue was there to block her. After a few seconds of this, Yuuka started firing back, and the two of them flew about, trying to dodge each other's attacks. The battle quickly ascended to the air, and Shimi watched them from below, realizing that at the speed they're moving and with all the danmaku flying around, he couldn't intervene even if he wanted to. Yuuka flew above the tongue, blasting Tokage in the face with a laser and ending her spell card. Tokage shook off the injury and prepared her next card, while Yuuka simply floated in front of her, completely unscathed.

"It doesn't matter how many cards you use, the result will be the same."

"Shut up! Writer Sign: Writer's Block!" A wave of green arrow-like danmaku flew around Yuuka, trapping her in what seemed to be a box. Tokage started glowing, and Yuuka smiled in amusement.

"Oh, a giant laser? You have guts to try that on me, I'll give you that! Tell you what, if you give up now, I'll let you keep one organ, your pick!" Tokage responded by firing said giant laser at Yuuka, knowing that she couldn't dodge it. Yuuka simply laughed and opened her parasol. The laser smashed into her, but the parasol acted as a shield, holding the laser back. Tokage put more power into the attack, and Yuuka grabbed the parasol with both hands, trying to hold it steady while the laser slowly but surely pushed her back. After a few seconds of this, it was clear Yuuka was going to smash into the danmaku behind her. She grimaced and a spell card appeared next to her. "I didn't think you could entertain me so well… but this is where our little farce ends. Master Spark!" A far larger laser erupted from Yuuka's parasol, blasting through Tokage, and ending her spell card. The lizard smashed into the wall behind her and collapsed. "Well, I did say you couldn't beat me, what did you expect?" She walked over to Tokage and knelt down, looking her in the eye. "For someone as weak as you are, you did well. However… now you'll have to pay for wasting my time." She smiled warmly. "I think you'll pay in blood. Don't die too quickly, ok?" She lunged at the lizard, aiming to impale her with her parasol, but she was surprised when Shimi suddenly grabbed it.

He smiled eerily.

"Tell me, Yuuka. Just what are you doing?"

"Oh, just getting revenge."

"For Tokage attacking you, which she did because you did horrible things to her?"

"Exactly so. Move."

"Um… no. You have two choices, Miss Kazami. Either you stop this, and we leave in peace, or I will beat you within an inch of your life. What do you choose?"

Yuuka laughed, and pulled her parasol out of his grip, backing up as she did.

"Beat me? Ha! That's funny. Here's a counter-proposal, boy: You leave, never come back, I keep the girl, and _maybe _I won't tear off one of your arms before you run away crying."

Shimi sighed.

"The pointless threats have gone on long enough. It seems we've reached an impasse. True, I am rather horrible at danmaku, but a simple brawl? That I can handle."

Yuuka's grin widened.

"Well, this should be fun, then. It's been ages since I've torn someone limb from limb!" She charged at Shimi, trying to grab him, but he jumped over her, opening a portal as he did so. He quickly pulled Soul Edge out of it, slicing at Yuuka's head. The youkai tried to jump out of the way, but her surprise at seeing the demonic sword caught her off guard, and Shimi hit her with the flat of the blade, sending her flying into a wall. She quickly stood up, dodging another slash. "Edgy? Is that you?"

The blade's eye opened, and it focused on her.

"Yuuka? It's you! How've you been?"

Shimi slashed at her again, but Yuuka simply stepped out of the way and carried on like nothing happened.

"Just fine. I hope you don't mind if I kill the boy, do you?"

The weapon chuckled.

"By all means, go ahead. I've been trying to kill him for years now."

"Really? Then what stopped you? Oh Edgy, I thought you were better than this, taking on more than you can handle… Oh well, I guess I'll do your job for you."

Shimi scowled.

"Stop ignoring me! He's not your opponent, right? Pay attention to me!"

Yuuka laughed.

"Oh, sorry. I just saw an old friend and just had to stop everything and talk with him. By all means, keep trying to kill me."

"Don't you mock me…" Yuuka kept smiling at him infuriatingly. "This is just a joke to you, isn't it? Take me seriously!" He slashed at her again, and this time she simply parried it with her parasol and let momentum carry him forward into her next attack. She kicked him, sending him flying into a wall and making him lose his grip on Soul Edge. Before she could grab it, however, Shimi blasted her in the face, making her stumble back, and tentacles sprouted from his back, wrapping around her legs and making her fall, while pulling Soul Edge back towards him. Shimi smiled. "Hello, Edgy."

The sword shook with rage.

"Don't call me that! Only Yuuka calls me that!"

"Really? I thought I called you that a few chapters ago…" He was distracted from his musings by Yuuka, who stabbed at him with her parasol. He jumped out of the way, and Yuuka smiled, pulling her parasol out of the hole it made in the wall. She snapped her fingers and the flowers on the door came to life, their vines lashing out and wrapping around Shimi's limps, holding him in midair. He struggled to escape, but the vines wouldn't budge. Yuuka floated up to him, pointing her parasol directly at his heart.

"So, looks like you overestimated yourself."

Shimi did his best to smile.

"We'll see who's right after I break out of the vines."

Yuuka moved her arm back, ready to run him through.

"What makes you think you'll have to opportunity? See, I'm not like those fools who just monologue and let the heroes escape. I just kill. Or maim. Or maim, then kill with a side of torture."

A notebook appeared next to Shimi, writing all this down.

"Please, go on, tell me more."

"Sorry, that's all the gloating you'll get out of me." With that said, she lunged forward to impale him, only for a green blur to slam into her, knocking her attack off course and sending her flying a few feet. "You…don't you know when to give up?" Tokage breathed weakly, trying to stay afloat.

She whispered,

"Shimi, can you get free?"

"I'm afraid not. Don't worry, though, I have a plan to get us out of this. Reach in my pocket." Tokage did as he asked, and pulled out a spell card. Yuuka simply looked amused at the proceedings, wondering what would happen next. She silently charged up energy in her parasol, preparing another Master Spark just in case this new card was more difficult than she expected.

"I hope you know what you're doing, Shimi…" She activated the spell card. "Plot Armor: Mary Sue!" There was a bright flash as the card took effect… and nothing changed. Shimi looked amused, Tokage horrorstruck, and Yuuka was simply bored.

She shook her head in disgust.

"I was nice enough to give you one last chance, and you waste it on a card that does nothing? …No, there is some magic in the air… some kind of magical barrier? Well, whatever it is, I doubt it will fare any better than you two did. Master Spark!" She fired her annihilating blast of sadistic love, but once the blast touched Tokage's fair emerald scales, it reflected off her pure pureness and came back at Yuuka, slamming the vile youkai the wall with ironic force.

Tokage looked at the devastation, her luminescent eyes widening in shock.

"Shimi, what just happened?"

The boy chuckled with dark humor.

"That's the effect of that card. It's kind of like my Lunatic Sign: Plot Armor, except that just stops things from hitting you. The 'Mary Sue' card, on the other hand, does that too, but instead of just saving you, it basically makes everything revolve around you, like a poorly written hack character who can stop villains by breathing in their direction. In other words, it makes you a Mary Sue until it wears off. I really hate using it, since it takes the fun out of fighting." explained Shimi boorishly, reciting his speech as though to a grand audience, when he didn't deserve even to be in Tokage's presence. "Oh yeah, it also makes the narrator a annoying sycophant. Really need to fix that bug." He continued, cruelly breaking the fourth wall and hurting the narrator's feelings. Jerk. "Ok, there's no reason to insult me. It seems Yuuka's unconscious, so if you could let me down from here, I'll turn the card off."

Tokage selflessly untied the vines which, without Yuuka's evil control, became limp at her wondrous touch. Once Shimi was free, he looked up, grinned evilly, and snapped his fingers, canceling the spell card. Once he was certain the card had lost all effect, he looked down at Yuuka. "Yup, she's definitely not waking up soon. I'd say we made our point… whatever it was."

Tokage sighed in relief.

"At least I know she won't bother me again."

"Well, I guess we should get going. Oh! Before we do, I believe it's only proper we leave our host with a gift." He opened a portal and pulled out a red flower with what seemed to be two red dots for eyes. "You know, just to make her hate us a little less." He put the flower down next to Yuuka, along with a note. With their errand done, Shimi and Tokage left to plan their next chapter.

* * *

Yuuka woke up a few minutes later, not long by most standards, but far too late to track down her new enemies. The youkai shakily got up. "How did that girl do that?" She knew that spell card had something to do with her laser reflecting and hitting her, but what kind of power was it? And more importantly, how could she get her hands on it? She didn't contemplate the issue long, however, before she noticed something nearby. It was a potted red flower, with a note attached to it. Yuuka picked up the note, curious:

_Dear Yuuka Kazami,_

_I just wanted to apologize for our rude behavior during our visit. Admittedly, Lady Tokage and I didn't expect any other reaction from you, Miss Kazami, but we'd hoped that the fighting would reach a less painful conclusion for all of us, and that we could sit down and talk about everything over some tea, like Miss Hakurei seems so fond of doing. I'm sorry that we couldn't have been friends, Miss Kazami, but there's no point in regretting the past. Rather, I think we should look back on it fondly and laugh at the memories. For instance, the look on your face when you was hit by your own Master Spark was priceless. Anyway, in hopes that we can put today behind us, I left behind a gift, a special flower from another world I visited once. I hope you like it._

_Love, Shimi._

_P.S. When I said 'love', I was just being nice. I was saying it in a friendly kind of way, not romantic. So don't stalk me._

Yuuka chuckled at the last part of the note, then turned attention to the flower. Despite having what seemed to be eyes, the flower took no notice of her. "And just what are you, little one?" She picked it up and took it to her greenhouse upstairs, intending to plant it. She stared at the flower, sensing some kind of power hidden inside it. "My, you're a very special one, aren't you? I wonder what kind of secrets you're hiding? Ah, it doesn't matter for now. For now, Mama Yuuka's going to take very good care of you, yes. Once you're fed and with your fellow flowers, then we'll talk." With her ability to control flowers, Yuuka quickly determined what kind soil is best for her new flower, as well as how much water is needed. Once it was planted properly and Yuuka started watering it, she turned her attention to this power inside it. She couldn't tell what it was, or how it was activated, but she knew she would figure it out eventually. "That boy, Shimi… I suppose I'll let him live this time. After all," she cooed, "if he was dead then I wouldn't have you, would I?" She stroked the flower, and to her surprise, it shook slightly. She watched it for a second, but nothing else happened. The flower wasn't hurt by this, so Yuuka stroked it again, and it shook even more, stirring up the power inside it. Curious, Yuuka wrapped her hand gently around the flower, and the flower shot out a burst of flame, nearly singeing Yuuka's face and promptly setting all the nearby plants ablaze. Yuuka hurriedly put them out with her watering can, and stared at the Fire Flower in astonishment. "So, that's the power you were hiding…" A low chuckle built up in her throat, coming out as maniacal laugher. "Oh, you're going to make me proud, I can tell!" She quickly unearthed the flower and moved it far away from the rest of the plants. "But don't worry, Mama doesn't blame you, little one. You're just following your nature. I have to wonder what kind of hellish world would have fire-breathing plants, but no matter. You're still under my care, and I'll help you grow. Now, I have a certain human to find. They make the best fertilizer."

* * *

Shimi and Tokage sat down in her house, exhausted. "Tokage, remind me never to mess with Yuuka again."

"Right… do you think she'll come after us?"

"No, we're safe. Now, where did we leave off?"

"Um… Mima was going to help Dawitsu and Yutaka, but for a price… which you still haven't told me."

Shimi chuckled.

"True, I haven't. But that's just because I didn't know. But, I think I have a pretty good idea of what she'd want. Anything else?"

"Well, what's possessing Yutaka?"

"Oh, that?" He chuckled. "You know."

"I… do?"

"Yeah, you already know, you just don't know you know."

"Can't you tell me?"

"You'll find out when we get there, I'm sure."

Tokage glared at him, but it was clear he wasn't going to say anything.

"Fine, let's get started then…"


	10. The Great Speech of Hate

_The Hakurei Shrine, the next morning_

Mima appeared in front of the shrine, grinning ear to ear. "Reimu!" There was no answer. "Hmm, she must still be asleep. Oh well, more fun for me." She floated into the shrine and found Reimu sleeping. "Aw, she looks so cute when she sleeps… WAKE UP!"

Reimu jumped, startled into consciousness.

"What? What's going on?" She rubbed her eyes. "Oh, it's you."

"That's right! Now get up, Hakurei, because now you're going to fulfill your end of our deal."

"Why do I have to do anything? It's that tengu guy's friend, shouldn't you ask him?"

"I would, but you also want to help this Yutaka girl, and I actually have a reason to mess with you, so…"

"I hate you."

"Aw, how sweet. Anyway, get dressed or whatever it is you humans do, and come with me." Mima floated out of the shrine, while Reimu muttered to herself and got out of bed. She came out of the shrine a few minutes later, glaring at Mima.

"Ok, so I have to do something for you to fix Yutaka. But that doesn't mean I won't seal you too if you try anything stupid."

Mima laughed.

"Oh, I won't ask much of you. First of all, you will refer to me as 'God-Empress Mima-sama' for the rest of the day."

Reimu's eye twitched in irritation, but she simply said,

"Yes, God-Empress Mima-sama. That's kind of long, though… can I call you something else?"

"God-Empress Mima-sama allows this. From now on you'll just call me 'Mima-sama.' Now that that's clear, I have only one task for you." She pulled out a piece of paper. "I want you to go to the Human Village, get everyone together, and read this to them."

Reimu snatched the paper from her suspiciously.

"Why? What does it-" She stared at the paper in horror. "You, you… There's no way I'm going to read this!"

Mima feigned confusion.

"That's odd, I thought I heard you say you wouldn't do it. But I couldn't have heard that! After all, would Reimu Hakurei really abandon one of her friends to demonic possession? No, that's just ridiculous!"

"…Fine. But I swear, you're going to pay for this, _Mima-sama_." She said her name like it was the foulest curse imaginable.

"I wouldn't have it any other way, Reimu. Now come on, may as well get your big speech over with, right?" Grumbling to herself, Reimu started flying to the Human Village, with Mima laughing behind her.

_Dawitsu Mansion, the same time_

Dawitsu paced back and forth, muttering to himself. Yukari watched him pace for a minute, got bored, then opened a gap. She watched it fixedly for a minute, frowned, and said, "Dawitsu, I think I have some good news for you." Dawitsu looked up. "Mima simply wants Reimu to do a few things for her, and then she'll fix Yutaka."

Dawitsu's face lit up for a second, then he saw Yukari's expression.

"What's wrong? This is good news, right?"

Yukari nodded.

"The only thing she wants her to do is give a speech to the village. I don't like the idea of Reimu becoming a laughingstock…"

Dawitsu tried to smile reassuringly.

"Well, maybe she'll get more donations this way…"

Yukari rolled her eyes.

"Well, I see your humor is as pathetic as ever… anyway, I can't let this happen."

"But if she doesn't do what Mima says, Mima won't fix Yutaka!"

"Don't you think I know that? This situation requires… Chen, where are you?"

Another gap appeared, and Chen came out.

"Did you call me, Yukari-sama?"

"Yes. Is Ran alright?"

"Yes, Yukari-sama! Eirin said she should be back on her feet by tomorrow!"

"That's good… Well, then, you will have to do for now." She whispered in Chen's ear. "Do you understand? We need to make sure Reimu isn't humiliated, without interrupting the speech." Chen nodded and jumped into another gap, vanishing from sight.

_The Human Village, an hour later_

"Well, here we are, Reimu. Your big moment."

Reimu glared at the evil spirit.

"Just shut up and get this started."

Mima cackled.

"Of course." She fired some lasers into the air, drawing the villagers attention. "Attention, pathetic human meatbags! I, the evil spirit Mima, would like to make a announcement. Or rather, Reimu Hakurei would. Reimu, what do you have to say to your human… friends? Targets? Hostages? Faceless masses? Do you even know these people? Well, they don't matter. Let's get this show going, right buddy?"

Reimu's glare couldn't have been more murderous if she'd suddenly been granted laser vision.

"Fine." The shrine maiden flew up on to a building, just as Mima had told her to drawing even more curious onlookers. Just to make it absolutely clear she didn't want to do this, Reimu pulled out the speech and started reciting it in a dead monotone. "Hello, everyone. As you probably know, I'm Reimu Hakurei, shrine maiden of the Hakurei Shrine and youkai exterminator. What you may not know is that I'm horribly incompetent at both of my jobs. As a shrine maiden, I should be able to seal away any youkai or remove any spirit, but proof that I can't do either floats before you." Mima waved for effect, as the audience started muttering to themselves and pointing, making Reimu even more embarrassed. These people looked up to her, after all, and here she was following the orders a evil spirit. She kept reading. "I could never seal Mima away for long, she quickly escaped any seal I made. And now, when one of my friends is possessed, she's the only one with the knowledge to save her." By this point her audience was starting to get angry. After all, what if they was the one possessed? What would Reimu do then? "As a exterminator, my only opponents were Mima, who was holding back, a vampire, and a hungry ghost. Everything else I ever claimed to do was with the help of…" Her eyes bulged in renewed horror. She hadn't read this part yet.

Mima floated over to her, putting a hand on her shoulder.

"Go on, read it."

Reimu's eyes burned with a fury Hell couldn't match, but she dutifully recited:

"Everything else I ever did was done with the help of Marisa, the former student of God-Empress Mima-sama and your future ruler, since in her infinite kindness Mima-sama said Marisa could have the human village when she takes over Gensokyo."

Before she could continue, Marisa's voice rang out of the crowd, saying,

"But Mima, I told you I don't want to rule over the village!"

Mima glared in her direction.

"You'll rule over these people with an iron fist and like it, young lady!"

"I'm not a kid anymore, you can't tell me what to do!"

Reimu smirked, and Mima growled angrily, her staff appeared in her hand.

"I can't tell you what to do, huh? Come out, then, we'll see how tough you are in battle!"

Marisa laughed.

"Tempting… but no. Why should I do anything if Reimu'll just beat you for me?"

"Marisa Kirisame, I am your master, and you will treat me with the respect I deserve!"

"Former master. I left, remember? Like I'm leaving now." Marisa shot out of the crowd on her broomstick, laughing as she flew off into the Forest of Magic. The audience laughed too, while Mima twitched angrily. Reimu nudged her cheerfully.

"So, should I finish reading this? It's got some nice stuff on the horrors Marisa will rain down on people under your rule and stuff…" The audience laughed harder and Mima slashed at her, but Reimu jumped out of the way easily.

"Just… shut up." Mima sighed, regaining her composure. "Fine, you kept your end of the bargain, I'll help Yutaka. Now come on, before I change my mind."

_The Forest of Magic, just outside the Human Village_

Chen adjusted the bazooka, making final adjustments before she fired. Giggling to herself, she was about to pull the trigger, when a gap opened and Yukari looked out of it. "Never mind, Chen, it seems Reimu managed to escape complete humiliation. You don't have to shoot Mima."

Chen looked disappointed.

"But Yukari-sama, I never get to fire the snow cannon! Just once! Please?"

Yukari chuckled.

"Alright, one shot."

_The Human Village_

Reimu and Mima started to leave, but before they could leave the village a small boy ran up to them.

"Wait, wait! Miss Hakurei, evil spirit person!"

Mima glared at the kid as he got closer.

"You couldn't even remember my name?"

"Sorry…"

"Well, what do you want?"

"Um, did you say something's wrong with Miss Hadekawa?"

"Miss- Oh, Yutaka. Yeah, she's possessed."

"And, um, you're going to fix her?"

"Yeah, I guess."

"Thank you!" The boy tried to hug her, but the only part she could reach was her tail.

Mima's glare softened slightly.

"Uh, you're welcome. Now let go of my tail before I strangle you with it."

"Um, ok… bye, Miss Mima!" The boy ran off, and Mima stared after him.

"Stupid kids… someone needs to teach them to some respect. Oh yeah, Yutaka's their teacher, right?" Reimu nodded. "Hmm… maybe I should be a biology teacher, show them what their insides look like… could be fun."

Reimu just shrugged, not really caring.

"I guess. Right now, though…"

"Yeah, yeah, I'm going to the Shrine, you stupid-" They was cut off by a loud boom as a giant pile of snow fell on Mima. "…I don't know who did that, but they're going to pay."

_Hakurei Shrine_

Mima was still dripping when they made it back to the Shrine. Once she dried herself off, she quickly found Yutaka's hokora and summoned her staff. Reimu was watching intently, eager to find out how she was going to get the evil sprit out. Dawitsu and Yukari walked out of one of her gaps, just as Mima slashed the hokora with the blade on her staff, somehow not damaging it at all, but _something _had been pulled out of it. It seemed to be a green floating orb, glowing slightly. Reimu quickly unsealed Yutaka, and the hokora glowed and shattered to pieces, revealing the unconscious youkai girl. Relieved that she was safe, Dawitsu turned his attention to the thing Mima had summoned.

"Is that the evil spirit?"

Mima nodded.

"Strange, it should have done something by now, but it's just floating there." Apparently spurred on by her words, the spirit started growing. Everyone backed up, not sure what to do, and it stopped growing once it was human-sized. It changed shape, forming arms, legs, and a tail. It's features became more apparent, and soon it was clearly a lizard youkai in a nurse's outfit, grinning manically. Her blue eyes twitched occasionally while darting back and forth, trying to watch everyone at once. A dim aura surrounded her, a warning of the power she was hiding.

Dawitsu stared at her, unnerved at the resemblance to a certain annoying acquaintance of his.

"Who are-" Before he could say anything else, the spirit was right in front of him, her grin even bigger. She hugged him, much to his surprise and pain. "Ahhh! Let me go!"

The spirit cackled.

"Oh, I could never do that, my adorable little Dawitsu!" He tried to break free, but it was futile.

Yukari finally managed to pull him away from her and he asked, "How do you know who I am, anyway?"

Instead of answering, the lizard focused on Yukari's hand, and gasped dramatically.

"Yukari, you're getting married?" She looked back and forth between Dawitsu and Yukari, and she jumped ecstatically. "To Dawitsu! Yay, it worked!"

Yukari narrowed her eyes.

"What worked?"

"My plan, of course! Oh, I haven't introduced myself! I'm Hachuurui, the greatest doctor and nurse in the universe and the angel of love!"

**Editor's Notes: **Well, that worked out well, I think. Oh, quit looking at me like that, Lady Tokage! I didn't know what to do until we wrote it. I didn't like the Mima-bashing or whatever, but I just go where the writing takes me...

**Reviews for Chapter 5**

Mateyuu Dawitsu: Oh my, am I really that studly and manly? My depiction was so very nice in this, you can really see my good side, and... what do you mean I wasn't described sufficiently to tell?

Yukari Yakumo: Hmm. You know what, even though I like featuring in the title, I prefer to be operating from the sidelines. Mima can have the spotlight... wait, hold on, my contract with ZUN forbids me to say that. Yeah, Mima can stay forever forgotten... I guess.

Mima: Gods damn it, I knew there was a conspiracy at ZUN level preventing me from entering the new games!

Yutaka Hadekawa: Awww... you put in a child who wanted me back? That's... that's... so sweet! As long as it isn't Sosake. That child is disturbing on so many levels.

Reimu Hakurei: Mima is petty enough to do that. And, you know what, I think that the events probably would turn out that way. Mima has always had too much of a soft spot for Marisa, enough to let her humiliate her in public.

Mima's second review: That is not true! I'll show you! I'll show you all! When I take over Gensokyo, I'll (review discontinued by ZUN)


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